Aug 30, the moment i woke up this morning, i could feel the pain. ouch....my entire body hurts, especially my knees. i came back from snowtrip last night, spent the weekend up at Lake Mountain in Johnny & Tina's house in Marysville, situated at the foot of the mountain.

yes, it was my first experience at snow....guess it will also be my last time. it wasn't as fun as i thought it would be. i suffered a big patch of blue-black on my knee while trying to brake when i slided down the slope in my tabogan (it's a plastic board you could sit in; used for sliding down the slopes). yes, i was so clumsy...i "flew" down the slope, hit myself on the hard rocks and rolled over till i got down to the bottom. it was simply embarrassing!~ i became the centre of attraction for a moment in time as everyone stared at this spectacular scene unfolding before their eyes?! oh well~ the only thing i seriously learn from this trip is to learn how to tell myself: it's ok to fall, just pull yourself up together and rise up again..it was learning the 'never give-up' attitude. even in life, it's always not a smooth journey. when we fail, we just gota learn how to pick ourselves up. despite the laughter and sacarscism others may show, no matter how weak i may feel, no matter how lousy the experience is, life still goes on.

while on my skiis, i fell down many times too...to the point that i didn't even have enough energy to pick myself up ever again. there were a few times when i tried to get up while i was on a slope but just as i was about to do so, i slipped down the slope and this time, worst!?! i told myself:"i really wana go home...i don't want to skii anymore! am i there yet? how much longer is this journey? i'm reaching soon...hang in there..." but still, there was a long way to go.

as it turned out, i was the slowest skiier in the group and so, all through the journey, i was pretty much alone. there was a period of 15-20minutes when i thought i was lost in the snow mountain, because the others were very much ahead....and i came to this part of the mountain where there wasn't a distinctive path to go. i felt scared...it felt as if i were the only one stucked in this part of the mountain. the trees were swaying, the ice slopes were all around, but i don't seem to spot a single soul around! the worst thing was: i don't know my directions....i don't have a map....and i was lost! all alone, i tried to find my way but still, to no avail. i continued my journey anyway, trying so hard to concentrate both on balancing well on my skiis and where i was going. at that moment, i felt like crying....never had such a strong urge to do that until that very moment. tears didn't fall as i tried to stay as strong as i could....

it was tough to struggle through that alone....and that's why, i didn't really enjoy myself throughout the skii trip as much as i had wanted to. perhaps i wasn't born with such adventurous talents; not cut-out for sports and adventure. i feel ashamed to say that i'm lousy in all these things. i feel a sudden plunge in my self-esteem.