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Saturday, August 20, 2005

August 20

each of us is given 24 hrs everyday. what do we do with that 'limited' amount of time? everyone is busy...the important question to ask, in singrish terms, is: "busy with what?" shouldn't we spend more time on things which we value most? yes indeed. i'm fully aware of the importance of relationships in my life. always make it a point to spend enough time with close friends, loved ones and family. even though it may sometimes be particulary challenging balancing work against such priorities, i found those the most fulfilling and memorable moments of my life. i look forward to these moments because they are more precious than anything else in life.

been totally depressed over the past few days, agonising over the pain endured after speaking to someone who holds an important part of my life. been spending alot of my time waiting, simply waiting for him. in my heart i do know, nothing could ever replace the significance he has placed in my heart. i spent some moments recalling how he used to give excuses just to spend time with me. it may be just following me wherever i go, being my shadow, making a conscious effort to make his presence known. i used to feel terribly annoyed by this 'sticky glue' who just have nothing better to do. now that i think about it, i have gotten used to having him around so much that i'm beginning to miss it. now that he no longer has time for me, i feel that something is missing in my life. he just doesn't have the luxury of time to do those things which he used to do. he blames it all on his work; he has no time. no time to meet, no time to sms, no time to call. how should i put it? well, i've been spoilt by his love over the past few years. really wish that he could spend some moments with me, but.... i really need someone who is willing to spend time with me. isit too big a request to make?

~gracie left a note at 10:09 pm

Monday, August 08, 2005

Aug 8

it's national day eve. it doesn't feel like it at all for me. work continued to pile up enormously today. as usual, yes- so usual, that i left office at 8pm. actually i'm thankful that i was able to leave 'earlier', as elaine helped me a little with the administrative work which i had to do by wednesday. sigh~ sometimes i just wonder if i was slow in managing my work load or that i really have loads to do?! i feel seriously inadequate in multi-tasking. the more i try to do at the same time, i more blur i would be! my mind just stops functioning by 6pm?! it's normal, isn't it? we aren't machines; machines need breaks too!

ain't i glad that tomorrow's a public holiday?! been looking forward to it and i'm thankful i've gota reprieve now at this crucial stage of the project. im barred from taking leave or time offs by my boss; she made known through emails last friday, stopping all officers from doing so. oh well, what to do?! that's just how things are. i'm now pathetically looking forward to public holidays and more public holidays! can't imagine how life would be in the next few months! i'm already counting down to Deepavali!

anyway, it's good to sleep in tomorrow and not think about rushing, running around and meeting deadlines! how great is that?! i'm just going to concentrate on following up and finishing some of the important matters which need clearance by this wednesday. i have never felt so hardworking before! sigh~ looking ahead, i feel that i'd be extra busy this week!! in fact, super busy! had to prepare for worship song service, lead lesson study and jumble sale this weekend! how tiring could life be....?

~gracie left a note at 11:50 pm