marriage fidelity?
i have been catching the Chinese drama serial Woman of Times recently. was quite affected when i saw the scene where Xiyi(Fann Wong) decided to divorce Zengtu(Edmund Chen) after repeated extramarital flings. well you may say, hey it's just drama, why are you taking it so seriously?

watching that reminded me of my conversations with some friends over msn. they have been having flings outside of marriage, and they do not feel bitter about it. they expressed that they needed variety in life. afterall, they have been happily married for many years and they wana change. they are willing to set their jobs aside to meet up with girls outside just to have an hour or two together at hotel 81.

i stopped. i couldn't continue the conversation. questions flooded my mind. is there true love ever? does the ring on the fourth finger mean anything at all after years of marriage? why do you want to get married when you know that you will end up in divorce one day? to me, i have always known the fact that divorce rates has been escalating in most societies. i did a 5000-word report on divorce for my sociology subject at uni. i know the facts, but it never hit me till recently.

i begin to question faithfulness and fidelity in relationships and marriage. i have always been brought up in the environment where i see happy families and healthy relationships. just recently, i have been brought to a new world, the world of reality. much as i want to really hold on to the idea of eternity and forever-ness, im reminded that these things no longer exist. i have been couped up in a world of the happily-ever-after fantasy for too long.

i asked my girlfriend who doesn't lack admirers bringing her flowers everytime: why doesn't she give these men a chance? she told me, men can't be trusted. she would rather be single for the rest of her life. i thought it's just her own perceptions of marriage, of men and of life after marriage. however, now that i look at it, i realised that it's a wise option.

how could you ever entrust your life to a man who may be nice to you, but nice to other women much later? how are you so sure that he would whisper little sweet nothings into your ear only? if he's capable of doing that to you, he's capable of doing that to every other woman.